PTSD

Is Chris Burns Dead or Alive? An Exploration Eulogy for a Man on the Run

I have heard it from many people–because we really didn’t get to say goodbye–that I should write a goodbye. No graveside crying, or planning a celebration of life. No community gathering at a certain time on a certain day to share in the joy and grief of a life lost to us. No chance to …

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24/7 Surveillance and a Christmas to Remember. What Was Fugitive Chris Burns’ Involvement with Secret Security Group Goshawk?

Two Christmas’ ago (2019), Chris and I were separated. I was laying on the couch curled up under multiple blankets shivering, hoping that my nausea would hold itself back through the opening of presents. I had been a single parent for sixteen days by that Christmas. Philip says that all he remembers is the gift …

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When a Father Goes on the Run, What Happens to the Children Left Behind? What Becomes Normal?

It’s been hard to write the past few weeks. A few days ago, I spent around two hours discussing grief and trauma–what it means to carry a weary soul–with Philip. Everything feels harder in trauma–like we’re trying to run and keep up with life with weighted vests bearing down on our chests. We are struggling …

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Chris Burns Stole Over 10 Million Dollars and Left us to Pick up the Pieces. What We are Thankful For

I started this blog to give voice to my experience, my kids’ experience, and even (in future posts) the community’s experience of trauma and betrayal. I hope that sharing my experiences helps other women see the signs sooner–and that maybe as a society we will understand the power dynamics involved in manipulative relationships, how subtle …

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What We Went Through Right after Chris Burns Went on the Run from His 10 Million Dollar Ponzi Scheme

Eating out on Friday night with our family, Gavin wasn’t able to look any of us in the eyes. He sat with his head on the table resting on his crossed arms. He wasn’t talking–just a warm body sitting at the end; no real life exuding from his growing frame. I assumed he didn’t feel …

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Did Chris Burns Ever Love Us? We Struggle to Understand Why He Abandoned Us

Today, If I am being more honest with myself than I feel comfortable with, I miss my partner–someone I believed was my soulmate. I feel ashamed to say that. I feel confused feeling it. I judge my cognitive abilities when I realize my thoughts because I tell myself I am supposed to hate him for …

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Discarded Daughter, Discarded Family. How Can Fugitive Chris Burns Abandon his Family So Carelessly?

Arabella stepped up into my car, quickly bent down to pick something up off the floor, and was staring directly into my eyes asking me a question that left me speechless. The back lift gate of my car was fully open, and I could see straight through to her intense expression. She was fixated on …

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It Has Been One Year Since Chris Burns Went on the Run from the FBI. Knowing So Much More Now, This is What I Want to Say to Him

I’ve hit it. The one-year anniversary of the last day I ever heard from you. I got a text around 9:30 pm telling me you loved me and asking me to pray for you tomorrow which was strange because you were open about not believing in God or faith anymore. But I said I would …

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